When things start to be too much and I’ve finally exhausted my Netflix queue, I start to write music. Somehow writing a song helps me distill all my wild thoughts into a few phrases that resonate deeply with me—and then, of course, I imagine singing them to a packed house, and that imagined validation doesn’t hurt.
I thought I would share one with you! I am cheap and am not into paying for things that I can get for free, so the powers that be at WordPress won’t let me add it right in. Here’s the link! It is written about a previous unrequited crush, so be kind.
Yesterday I walked around the lake by Smith College during my lunch break. As I’ve written before, walks and Sarah’s mind are an electric combination. I was thinking about all the things I want in my life and was imagining a bright future ahead of me. Brighter than now, of course. Much shinier and more colorful and special.
I started to think about our own weird ways of having wild thoughts. Every individual seems to have a unique brand of neuroses and vulnerabilities. (And strengths, of course, but the neuroses are so much more interesting!)
I walked past couples laughing and students with their pink iPhones out taking pictures of the foliage. Every single one of them had their little inside voice directing them. Isn’t that fascinating? On some level, we will never know the complete reality of the person sitting next to us. Even our best friends have wild thoughts that we can’t entirely understand.
That can be overwhelming when you have a crush on someone, let me tell you! When you like someone, you have incredibly weird neuroses and vulnerabilities just below the surface, and the fact is that you have no idea what the other person is thinking. It could be about you, but it could also be about elephants. There is really no way to know.
And so I write songs. And sing them on repeat until the wild thoughts are a little more manageable and a little less toxic.
I’ve realized that there is no way for us to take a vacuum and suck up all our weirdness. We’re stuck with it. The sooner we realize it the sooner we start writing songs and doing whatever else we do to take our electric, shiny, colorful, weird vulnerabilities and neuroses and turn them into something more manageable, less toxic, and much, much, much more interesting.
And now a question:
What is your way to distill your wild thoughts into a few phrases that resonate deeply with YOU? Tell me! I want to know, because I could use some new techniques. Comment, email, send a carrier pigeon… And I’m going to shamelessly plug my Twitter feed, @srellisboo—be all high tech and TWEET it to me!